ABOUT ME
One of the most important aspects of counselling, and one of the things that can really make the difference in how effective it is. is the way the counsellor and client are able to work together.
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It can sometimes take a while to find the right person to work with, and it helps when trying to choose if you have a reasonable sense of who you're getting in touch with. This section is designed to give you a sense of my experience, my practice and my nature. If you are looking for information about counselling specifically, head here.
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TL;DR: Background in professional theatre, higher education and counselling. Existential philosophy. Humanistic practice base. Integrative skill set. LGBTQIA+. Neurodiverse. Creative, funny. My ikigai (Japanese term for your life's calling), to hold space for others to find themselves in.
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I came to counselling via other professional lives. I originally trained in theatre studies, and worked in professional theatre, in a number of backstage roles for over a decade. Theatre made me creative, curious, an active problem solver, and deeply interested in peoples stories. I left eight years ago to teach the things theatre had taught me, in a University setting.
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Despite my love of theatre, the signs of my becoming a counsellor were probably already apparent at school. I once had heated words in my GCSE English class with a peer who thought Sylvia Plath could have and should have just 'pulled herself together'. I respectfully disagreed. At University my theatre studies dissertation was on Sarah Kane, - not because of a connection to her work, but because of wanting to understand the deep internal struggle and suffering she experienced, and wanting to somehow, impossibly, make that better. Unsurprisingly, I failed. (The making better, not the dissertation.)
When I came to train as a counsellor I aligned very strongly with the Humanistic school of counselling. People learning who they are, how they feel and what they want, in their own time, and in their own way, seemed very respectful and very empowering to me. I value autonomy and peoples right to self determine, and fully believe that given the right support, time, and acceptance that everyone is capable of this. My solutions will not be your solutions, and only you know what they are (whether or not you know it, or how to recognise them yet). My job is to help you find them.
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Even though I have a humanistic base, I believe in taking solutions where we find them. If that, for you, means taking from other psychological models, spiritual practices, coaching, self help books, meditation, exercise, food or otherwise I am open to helping you explore those options. This is known as working integratively. Finding new ideas to introduce clients to, and growing as a practitioner simultaneously as a result is definitely one of the perks of the job. On top of my humanistic base I have a lot of experience with CBT through short term work with students.
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My client range is pretty diverse, however there are some things I'm particularly interested in and these often coincide with the experiences of students, which is why they're one of my specialisms. Developing autonomy, shedding identities that have been handed to us by other people, learning to feel less anxious and more capable in societies that systemically disempower us, and relating to and connecting with each other as our authentic selves, are all core themes that run through my interests, training and practice.
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I have a pretty existential view on life, and by extension, my work. The world often doesn't make sense. That doesn't mean that we can't make sense of it for ourselves in the time we have here, and use that knowledge to build a life that feels safe, comfortable, understandable, meaningful and happy.
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No ones experience is identical, but I do have lived experience of the following things and these may help you feel recognised or safe in approaching me if you experience similar. I would describe myself as neurodiverse. In the final year of my first undergrad degree, I was diagnosed with dyslexia, dyspraxia and AD(H)D, after years of inconsistent education and assuming the worst about myself. I still experience the effects of that neurodiversity, but it doesn't limit me beyond my ambitions for myself and my life. I belong to the LGBTQIA+ community, and I see that community as belonging to me. I'm a gay cis woman. My pronouns are she/her. If you are trans or gender questioning you will be safe and seen with me.
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In the counselling room, I'm warm, pragmatic, steady and open minded. I often use humour, particularly when I'm explaining things, and believe as much can be healed through laughter as can through grief, but never at the expense of you or your experience. I will treat everything you bring with the respect and the sincerity it deserves. Perhaps one of the most misunderstood things about counselling is that it is not always sad, and not always dark. We hold and explore a lot of hard, complicated and sad stuff in therapy, but therapy does not always need to be hard, complicated and sad.
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I was a counselling client long before I became a counsellor and so I have learned to be both, which I hope will help me help you find your way through this part of your journey.
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The Japanese have a term 'ikigai' meaning your purpose or reason for being. Your ikigai should fulfil four principles. What you love. What you are good at. What the world needs. And what you can earn a living from, giving you your passion, your mission your vocation and your profession. Counselling is mine. I'm glad to have a varied professional background, but only holding space for other people to find themselves in fulfils all four for me.
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I enjoy a great many things. Nature. Music. Exercise. Dancing. Reading and writing. Making things with my hands. Tea and cake.
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I hope this gives you a sense of who you'll be working with, should you choose to come for therapy with me.
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I look forward to hearing from you.